We keep watching movies and shows with people going through all kinds of things: family dramas, murder mysteries, love triangles, and good-looking vampires. The guy gets the girl, the murder gets solved, and the liar gets revealed. But in the grand mystery of life, are you the main character?
We all have our comfort show or movie we put on after a stressful day when all we want to do is stay in our comfort zones. It pulls us into its world and we ease into it like we belong there. Do you want to be the girl that two hot vampire brothers chase? The Vampire Diaries is waiting for you. Do you want to be a rich teenager who lives in the Upper East Side in New York and spends their time at scandalous parties? Gossip Girl would love to have you. Do you want to be a twenty-something with a cute little friend group and a beautiful two-bedroom, rent-controlled, purple-walled house? Friends is ready to welcome you home. One simple problem though, if you were to somehow find your way into the universe of the show you’re watching, would you be the character everyone either wants to date or wants to become; or would you be the one who lives next door, is barely ever mentioned, and doesn’t add anything to the plot? Let’s find out.
Find out if there’s enough excitement – and maybe a little danger – in your life.
The most pivotal and memorable events are always centered around the main character, not around the girl next door who never leaves her house or the guy who only appears on screen for thirty seconds. The main character is always on the move. If you fit the description of someone open to experiencing new things and able to leave their comfort zone, then congratulations! You have the potential to be the main character. But this is easier said and done, especially for someone like me who enjoys their calm nights in bed with a book in hand instead of going out to a bar to meet new people. If we stay cuddled in bed, relying solely on maladaptive daydreaming to keep us company, pursuing main character status will remain futile. You have to say yes more. You should go to that party or go on that date. Do it for the plot! (…literally.) If you end up not liking the party or the guy, leaving is always an option. Saying no is the safest bet, but the main character would take the risk. Remember that.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote: ‘All are architects of fate… living in these walls of time.’ It is up to you and no one else to create a life that will fulfill you. You know you deserve it and are capable, so why not go for it? You are the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. You cannot spend your days waiting for someone or something to come save you. If you want all the perks of being the “main character”, you can just hold out your hand and take them. They will not be easily handed to you, but they are worth fighting for. Your life can be just like a movie if you want it to be. All you have to do is romanticize it. Granted, you can’t exactly find a hot vampire to date… But you can live your very own version of a 2000s romcom.
“I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.”
William Ernest Henley
Find the right wardrobe and the right attitude.
The main character dresses to impress. That means you must create a banging Pinterest board of your chosen theme and start strutting to the wallet-draining wonderland: the mall. But it doesn’t end with the clothes, the most important detail is how you wear them. Everyone can tell when someone feels like they’re wearing something they don’t belong in. To appear confident in your skin and your new dazzling wardrobe, you can just take this simple and overused advice: fake it ’till you make it. Your attitude greatly affects how people see you. Being kind, strong, and authentic is always the move. Look at the main character of your favorite show; are they insecure and needy? Most likely not. They carry themselves with confidence and grace, which is why they have most of the screen time. People want to see poise and fearlessness, not insecurity and predictability. Act like the person you want to be, and slowly you will become them.
Don’t let the audience dictate your moves.
We all have that moment of wanting to scream through a screen to tell the blonde girl the killer is standing right behind her. We want to be heard by her, for her to run. But just as we cannot help her avoid the inevitable (which is the script, by the way. She was always going to die.) we also shouldn’t hear the views of those around us who are not part of our story. I am not saying to avoid your best friends’ advice and get back with your ex (which you shouldn’t). I am only saying that if every single person’s opinions mattered, they would continuously interfere with the script of our lives. And where’s the fun in that? Who would watch a scary movie where no one dies? Okay, that was a bit of an overkill… But you get the point. If we let the people around us dictate our every move, we will be nothing but a muppet, a shadow of those around us. And that takes away the magic of life. All of us have free will, which means we can decide when to screw up and when to pull an iconic (and slightly out of line) move which will leave the audience in shock. You, as the main character, hold the power of shock value and free will. Use them to your advantage. Always being calculated and careful can lead to a very stable, very boring life. Make mistakes! Learn from them, move on, then make some more. Don’t let the audience tell you where the killer is. Get up and find him yourself.
We all want to be the main character. And the truth is, we all are. Who better to lead in the performance of your life? The stage is your life, and the script is your story. Cast your actors, pick your costume, and put on a show. I assure you, both the people who love you and hate you will watch. Make it worth their time.
With love,
Lara